I’ve been getting back on studying these past couple of weeks, because there needs to be only one winner, and I can’t let a dumb PhD be the one. I’m a human being with thoughts, and he’s a crappy bunch of papers. We have a conflictual relationship, it’s very complicated.
And looking back at myself, when I was all like « I can’t do it anymore », I realized that it’s the very core problem of it. We’re all guilty of doing this in our daily life; giving labels to ourselves. We always say stuff like « I’m a bad cook », or « I’m not a good writer », negative connotations about ourselves. And some can argue that those are facts, but I don’t believe they are. Facts are some things that are irrevocable, definitive, like when the sun shines in the morning; when you go to sleep at night you expect it to when you wake up. Otherwise if it doesn’t, our planet has gone to shit and we’re all probably going to die. Or we entered the long night. Whichever works. But still, it’s a definite fact; labels that you put to yourself, your abilities, aren’t. You as a person, are ever changing, ever growing, you can become what you want to.
People that want to be singers for instance, work for it. Whether they’re born with an amazing talent, or not at all, they all need singing lessons and care and dedication for their passion. They decided that that was what they wanted to with their lives, so they put their minds into it. When you put your mind into realizing what you believe, you find success. If you don’t believe you can, you obviously will never succeed. If you don’t think you’re great at what you do, you’re gonna keep failing.
And this mindset we have concerning our abilities and what we can or can’t do, comes from little gatherings we do as we grow up, consisting of comments we’ve received and heard about ourselves. A teacher that got frustrated with you and told you ‘math isn’t your thing huh?’, or your parents, people around you, that may have said something like ‘your writing sucks’, ‘my kid is better at this than that’, information you stored and grew up to believe in. Eventually, if you don’t think you’re great at physics, there’s no way at all you’re gonna ace your tests. And the results you get kinda confirm what you think and it goes on, until you’re convinced that some things just aren’t for you. We can’t be good at everything right ? No, false.
When people created furniture, amazing technology, ways of transportation, it all started from an idea in their minds, that flourished into designs, that led to reality. If they hadn’t had these thoughts in the first place, how in hell would it have ever been possible for these things to exist? If you don’t believe you’re good at something, how in hell will you ever be able to realize it ? Do you think by believing you’re bad at cooking, you’re gonna cook something worthy of a five star chef ? Of course not, so it all starts in your mind. Our little brains, that have been conditioned, they need to be de-conditioned. You’re a grown person, you think by yourself, you can’t let what others think of you, say of you, be what you are. You’re capable of way more than that. You can be anything you want, you just have to believe it.
Change does not happen overnight, you spend probably more than 20 years thinking the same way, you’re not gonna wake up someday, suddenly having a completely different train of thoughts. Everything takes time, when you’re heartbroken, you think you’re gonna suffer forever, that you’re never going to smile again, that happiness isn’t for you anymore. And someday you wake up, months later, maybe years later, and you realize, you’re not that hurt anymore. And somehow, you can fall in love again. Your heart and your brain needed time, nature works this way. So if you want to change your beliefs, about who you are as a person, and design new thoughts in your brain, you have to give it time, and some dedication. You have to want to change.
It all sounds like a fucking painful process, starting it sounds like a lot of work, but you’re not here to be defined by other people, you define yourself. And if you were a kid that couldn’t, now you’re an adult who can. I’m not saying become a chef, or a writer, or a tv star, I’m just saying if you feel like doing something, but you think you suck at it, think twice. What you do at first may seem mediocre to you, but if you keep doing it, you’ll end up being great. I can show you before and after pictures of athletes, but I think you got the gist. And just stop sending negative thoughts to your brain, he hears you.